Brian Cashman: Please take our sale items

 Photo Source: [PartMule]

Yo! B-Cash!

What’s up?

So basically our team is in the cellar, and we’re trying to get rid of some crappy players err, I mean some players that aren’t the “right fits” for us..You already got Richie Sexson! And you basically got that extremely tall, under-achieving 1st baseman for FREE!

I heard your franchise man Jorge Posada got injured the other day..he might even undergo a season-ending surgery? If so, you should really take a look at Kenji Johjima!

Kenji is struggling in a Mariner uniform, and if history repeats itself, when he goes from a Mariner uniform to another uniform he’ll turn out to be really good..(David Bell, Scott Podsednik, Brian Fuentes, etc.. Maybe him and Sexson can tag-team and start lighting a fire under your under achieving lineup cough *CANO* cough. Plus since our brainless front office signed Kenji for three more years, you can take his over priced contract as well!

So you might be wondering..why the HELL are the Tampa Bay Rays ahead of the mighty Yankees?? One word, Pitching. You don’t have any. And guess what. We do…If Jerrad Washburn counts. Washburn could be the missing piece on your team. He may be the missing link to put the Rays back in their place where they belong..3rd-5th place in the AL East.

If you get this email, let me know, we can only trade these great players to you until July 31st so hit me up as soon as possible. (If you help me pull these deals off, I might get the GM job in Seattle in the off-season. If you rub my back, I’ll rub yours..wink wink)


Lee Pelekoudous